Posted on 2 Comments

Untold Tales of Hollywood #80

In our researching of crematoriums and mortuaries, writer-director Dan O’Bannon and I were given surprisingly generous access to their behind-closed-doors operations. At one mortuary the owner said, “You’ve never seen a corpse? Let me show ya.”

He reached over to a coffin-sized box in his office and lifted the lid. There was the body of someone’s granny.

Another owner took us down to see the retort (cremation oven).

“You’ve never seen a body when it’s burning?” He opened the door to the retort. “Take a look…”

Inside the oven I saw what looked like parts of several human beings burning.

“Uh…how many corpses are you burning in there?”

“Three. It saves time and money to do three at once. I just divvy up the ashes into three piles after they’re all burnt. The families of the deceased never know.”

As we left the different mortuaries and crematoriums, the same thing happened every single time. As we were walking to Dan’s car, an employee would come running out of the building. Making sure they weren’t seen, the employee would glance furtively around before breathlessly telling us, “I just have to tell somebody — they’re having sex with the corpses in there!”

Like I said, this wasn’t just once. This happened at every single place we visited.

2 thoughts on “Untold Tales of Hollywood #80

  1. Bill,

    …So, is that a gag, some well-worn trope. Or is that sex with corpses really a thing? If it is, wow! How does that change the specifics in your will?
    “Yes sir, right there, a strict no sex with my dead corpse rule, as my body will be on co camera 24-7 until my body is interred in it’s final resting place”.


  2. Not a gag, sadly. These employees were dead serious (no pun intended).

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *